3 eclipse月食-第23部分

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“He　doesn’t　like　to　tell　other　people’s　stories　—　he　feels　like　he’s　betraying　confidences；　because　he　hears　
so　much　more　than　just　the　parts　they　mean　for　him　to　hear。”　

She　smiled　and　shook　her　head。　“I　probably　ought　to　give　him　more　credit。　He’s　really　quite　decent；　isn’t　
he？”　
“I　think　so。”　
“I　can　tell。”　Then　she　sighed。　“I　haven’t　been　fair　to　you；　either；　Bella。　Did　he　tell　you　why？　Or　was　that　
too　confidential？”　
“He　said　it　was　because　I　was　human。　He　said　it　was　harder　for　you　to　have　someone　on　the　outside　who　
knew。”　
Rosalie’s　musical　laughter　interrupted　me。　“Now　I　really　feel　guilty。　He’s　been　much；　much　kinder　to　me　
than　I　deserve。”　She　seemed　warmer　as　she　laughed；　like　she’d　let　down　some　guard　that　had　never　been　
absent　in　my　presence　before。　“What　a　liar　that　boy　is。”　She　laughed　again。　
“He　was　lying？”　I　asked；　suddenly　wary。　
“Well；　that’s　probably　putting　it　too　strongly。　He　just　didn’t　tell　you　the　whole　story。　What　he　told　you　was　
true；　even　truer　now　than　it　was　before。　However；　at　the　time　。　。　。”　She　broke　off；　chuckling　nervously。　“It’s　
embarrassing。　You　see；　at　first；　I　was　mostly　jealous　because　he　wanted　you　and　not　me。”　
Her　words　sent　a　thrill　of　fear　through　me。　Sitting　there　in　the　silver　light；　she　was　more　beautiful　than　
anything　else　I　could　imagine。　I　could　not　pete　with　Rosalie。　
“But　you　love　Emmett　。　。　。　；”　I　mumbled。　
She　shook　her　head　back　and　forth；　amused。　“I　don’t　want　Edward　that　way；　Bella。　I　never　did　—　I　love　
him　as　a　brother；　but　he’s　irritated　me　from　the　first　moment　I　heard　him　speak。　You　have　to　understand；　
though　。　。　。　I　was　so　used　to　people　wanting　me。　And　Edward　wasn’t　the　least　bit　interested。　It　frustrated　me；　
even　offended　me　in　the　beginning。　But　he　never　wanted　anyone；　so　it　didn’t　bother　me　long。　Even　when　we　
first　met　Tanya’s　clan　in　Denali　—　all　those　females！　—　Edward　never　showed　the　slightest　preference。　And　
then　he　met　you。”　She　looked　at　me　with　confused　eyes。　I　was　only　half　paying　attention。　I　was　thinking　about　
Edward　and　Tanya　and　all　those　females；　and　my　lips　pressed　together　in　a　hard　line。　
“Not　that　you　aren’t　pretty；　Bella；”　she　said；　misreading　my　expression。　“But　it　just　meant　that　he　found　
you　more　attractive　than　me。　I’m　vain　enough　that　I　minded。”　
“But　you　said　‘at　first。’　That　doesn’t　still　。　。　。　bother　you；　does　it？　I　mean；　we　both　know　you’re　the　most　
beautiful　person　on　the　pla。”　
I　laughed　at　having　to　say　the　words　—　it　was　so　obvious。　How　odd　that　Rosalie　should　need　such　
reassurances。　
Rosalie　laughed；　too。　“Thanks；　Bella。　And　no；　it　doesn’t　really　bother　me　anymore。　Edward　has　always　
been　a　little　strange。”　She　laughed　again。　
“But　you　still　don’t　like　me；”　I　whispered。　
Her　smile　faded。　“I’m　sorry　about　that。”　
We　sat　in　silence　for　a　moment；　and　she　didn’t　seem　inclined　to　go　on。　
“Would　you　tell　me　why？　Did　I　do　something　。　。　。　？”　Was　she　angry　that　I’d　put　her　family　—　her　Emmett　
—　in　danger？　Time　and　time　again。　James；　and　now　Victoria　。　。　。　
“No；　you　haven’t　done　anything；”　she　murmured。　“Not　yet。”　
I　stared　at　her；　perplexed。　
“Don’t　you　see；　Bella？”　Her　voice　was　suddenly　more　passionate　than　before；　even　while　she’d　told　her　
unhappy　story。　“You　already　have　everything。　You　have　a　whole　life　ahead　of　you　—　everything　I　want。　And　
you’re　going　to　just　throw　it　away。　Can’t　you　see　that　I’d　trade　everything　I　have　to　be　you？　You　have　the　
choice　that　I　didn’t　have；　and　you’re　choosing　wrong！”　
I　flinched　back　from　her　fierce　expression。　I　realized　my　mouth　had　fallen　open　and　I　snapped　it　shut。　
She　stared　at　me　for　a　long　moment　and；　slowly；　the　fervor　in　her　eyes　dimmed。　Abruptly；　she　was　
abashed。　
“And　I　was　so　sure　that　I　could　do　this　calmly。”　She　shook　her　head；　seeming　a　little　dazed　by　the　flood　of　
emotion。　“It’s　just　that　it’s　harder　now　than　it　was　then；　when　it　was　no　more　than　vanity。”　
She　stared　at　the　moon　in　silence。　It　was　a　few　moments　before　I　was　brave　enough　to　break　into　her　
reverie。　
“Would　you　like　me　better　if　I　chose　to　stay　human？”　
She　turned　back　to　me；　her　lips　twitching　into　a　hint　of　a　smile。　“Maybe。”　

　“You　did　get　some　of　your　happy　ending；　though；”　I　reminded　her。　“You　got　Emmett。”　
　“I　got　half。”　She　grinned。　“You　know　that　I　saved　Emmett　from　a　bear　that　was　mauling　him；　and　carried　
him　home　to　Carlisle。　But　can　you　guess　why　I　stopped　the　bear　from　eating　him？”　
　I　shook　my　head。　
　“With　the　dark　curls　。　。　。　the　dimples　that　showed　even　while　he　was　grimacingin　pain　。　。　。　the　strange　
innocence　that　seemed　so　out　of　place　on　a　grown　man’s　face　。　。　。　he　reminded　me　of　Vera’s　little　Henry。　I　
didn’t　want　him　to　die　—　so　much　that；　even　though　I　hated　this　life；　I　was　selfish　enough　to　ask　Carlisle　to　
change　him　for　me。　
　“I　got　luckier　than　I　deserved。　Emmett　is　everything　I　would　have　asked　for　if　I’d　known　myself　well　
enough　to　know　what　to　ask　for。　He’s　exactly　the　kind　of　person　someone　like　me　needs。　And；　oddly　enough；　
he　needs　me；　too。　That　part　worked　out　better　than　I　could　have　hoped。　But　there　will　never　be　more　than　the　
two　of　us。　And　I’ll　never　sit　on　a　porch　somewhere；　with　him　grayhaired　by　my　side；　surrounded　by　our　
grandchildren。”　
　Her　smile　was　kind　now。　“That　sounds　quite　bizarre　to　you；　doesn’t　it？　In　some　ways；　you　are　much　more　
mature　than　I　was　at　eighteen。　But　in　other　ways　。　。　。　there　are　many　things　you’ve　probably　never　thought　
about　seriously。　You’re　too　young　to　know　what　you’ll　want　in　ten　years；　fifteen　years　—　and　too　young　to　
give　it　all　up　without　thinking　it　through。　You　don’t　want　to　be　rash　about　permanent　things；　Bella。”　She　patted　
my　head；　but　the　gesture　didn’t　feel　condescending。　
　I　sighed。　
　“Just　think　about　it　a　little。　Once　it’s　done；　it　can’t　be　undone。　Esme’s　made　do　with　us　as　substitutes　。　。　。　
and　Alice　doesn’t　remember　anything　human　so　she　can’t　miss　it。　。　。　。　You　will　remember；　though。　It’s　a　lot　to　
give　up。”　
　But　more　to　get　in　return；　I　didn’t　say　aloud。　“Thanks；　Rosalie。　It’s　nice　to　understand　。　。　。　to　know　you　
better。”　
　“I　apologize　for　being　such　a　monster。”　She　grinned。　“I’ll　try　to　behave　myself　from　now　on。”　
　I　grinned　back　at　her。　
　We　weren’t　friends　yet；　but　I　was　pretty　sure　she　wouldn’t　always　hate　me　so　much。　
　“I’ll　let　you　sleep　now。”　Rosalie’s　eyes　flickered　to　the　bed；　and　her　lips　twitched。　“I　know　you’re　
frustrated　that　he’s　keeping　you　locked　up　like　this；　but　don’t　give　him　too　bad　a　time　when　he　gets　back。　He　
loves　you　more　than　you　know。　It　terrifies　him　to　be　away　from　you。”　She　got　up　silently　and　ghosted　to　the　
door。　“Goodnight；　Bella；”　she　whispered　as　she　shut　it　behind　herself。　
　“Goodnight；　Rosalie；”　I　murmured　a　second　too　late。　
　It　took　me　a　long　time　to　fall　asleep　after　that。　
　When　I　did　sleep；　I　had　a　nightmare。　I　was　crawling　across　the　dark；　cold　stones　of　an　unfamiliar　street；　
under　lightly　falling　snow；　leaving　a　trail　of　blood　smeared　behind　me。　A　shadowy　angel　in　a　long　white　dress　
watched　my　progress　with　resentful　eyes。　
　The　next　morning；　Alice　drove　me　to　school　while　I　stared　grumpily　out　the　windshield。　I　was　feeling　
sleepdeprived；　and　it　made　the　irritation　of　my　imprisonment　that　much　stronger。　
　“Tonight　we’ll　go　out　to　Olympia　or　something；”　she　promised。　“That　would　be　fun；　right？”　
　“Why　don’t　you　just　lock　me　in　the　basement；”　I　suggested；　“and　forget　the　sugar　coating？”　
　Alice　frowned。　“He’s　going　to　take　the　Porsche　back。　I’m　not　doing　a　very　good　job。　You’re　supposed　to　
be　having　fun。”　
　“It’s　not　your　fault；”　I　muttered。　I　couldn’t　believe　I　actually　felt　guilty。　“I’ll　see　you　at　lunch。”　
　I　trudged　off　to　English。　Without　Edward；　the　day　was　guaranteed　to　be　unbearable。　I　sulked　through　my　
first　class；　well　aware　that　my　attitude　wasn’t　helping　anything。　
　When　the　bell　rang；　I　got　up　without　much　enthusiasm。　Mike　was　there　at　the　door；　holding　it　open　for　me。　
　“Edward　hiking　this　weekend？”　he　asked　sociably　as　we　walked　out　into　the　light　rain。　
　“Yeah。”　
　“You　want　to　do　something　tonight？”　
　How　could　he　still　sound　hopeful？　
　“Can’t。　I’ve　got　a　slumber　party；”　I　grumbled。　He　gave　me　a　strange　look　as　he　processed　my　mood。　
　“Who　are　you　—”　

Mike’s　question　was　cut　short　as　a　loud；　growling　roar　erupted　from　behind　us　in　the　parking　lot。　
Everyone　on　the　sidewalk　turned　to　look；　staring　in　disbelief　as　the　noisy　black　motorcycle　screeched　to　a　stop　
on　the　edge　of　the　concrete；　the　engine　still　snarling。　
Jacob　waved　to　me　urgently。　
“Run；　Bella！”　he　yelled　over　the　engine’s　roar。　
I　was　frozen　for　a　second　before　I　understood。　
I　looked　at　Mike　quickly。　I　knew　I　only　had　seconds。　
How　far　would　Alice　go　to　restrain　me　in　public？　
“I　got　really　sick　and　went　home；　okay？”　I　said　to　Mike；　my　voice　filled　with　sudden　excitement。　
“Fine；”　he　muttered。　
I　pecked　Mike　swiftly　on　the　cheek。　“Thanks；　Mike。　I　owe　you　one！”　I　called　as　I　sprinted　away。　
Jacob　revved　his　engine；　grinning。　I　jumped　on　the　back　of　his　seat；　wrapping　my　arms　tightly　around　his　
waist。　
I　caught　sight　of　Alice；　frozen　at　the　edge　of　the　cafeteria；　her　eyes　sparking　with　fury；　her　lip　curled　back　
over　her　teeth。　
I　shot　her　one　pleading　glance。　
Then　we　were　racing　across　the　blacktop　so　fast　that　my　stomach　got　lost　somewhere　behind　me。　
“Hold　on；”　Jacob　shouted。　
I　hid　my　face　in　his　back　as　he　sped　down　the　highway。　I　knew　he　would　slow　down　when　we　hit　the　
Quileute　border。　I　just　had　to　hold　on　till　then。　I　prayed　silently　and　fervently　that　Alice　wouldn’t　follow；　and　
that　Charlie　wouldn’t　happen　to　see　me。　。　。　。　
It　was　obvious　when　we　had　reached　the　safe　zone。　The　bike　slowed；　and　Jacob　straightened　up　and　
howled　with　laughter。　I　opened　my　eyes。　
“We　made　it；”　he　shouted。　“Not　bad　for　a　prison　break；　eh？”　
“Good　thinking；　Jake。”　
“I　remembered　what　you　said　about　the　psychic　leech　not　being　about　to　predict　what　I’m　going　to　do。　
I’m　glad　you　didn’t　think　of　this　—　she　wouldn’t　have　let　you　go　to　school。