3 eclipse月食-第15部分

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gone；　and　I　didn’t　know　if　your　bloodsuckers　were　keeping　an　eye　on　you　or　not。　So　we　took　off　after　her　at　
full　speed；　but　she’d　crossed　the　treaty　line　before　we　caught　up。　We　spread　out　along　the　line；　hoping　she’d　
cross　back　over。　It　was　frustrating；　let　me　tell　you。”　He　wagged　his　head　and　his　hair　—　growing　out　from　the　
short　crop　he’d　adopted　when　he’d　joined　the　pack　—　flopped　into　his　eyes。　“We　ended　up　too　far　south。　
The　Cullens　chased　her　back　to　our　side　just　a　few　miles　north　of　us。　Would　have　been　the　perfect　ambush　if　
we’d　known　where　to　wait。”　
He　shook　his　head；　grimacing　now。　“That’s　when　it　got　dicey。　Sam　and　the　others　caught　up　to　her　before　
we　did；　but　she　was　dancing　right　along　the　line；　and　the　whole　coven　was　right　there　on　the　other　side。　The　
big　one；　what’shisname　—”　
“Emmett。”　
“Yeah；　him。　He　made　a　lunge　for　her；　but　that　redhead　is　fast！　He　flew　right　behind　her　and　almost　
rammed　into　Paul。　So；　Paul　。　。　。　well；　you　know　Paul。”　
“Yeah。”　
“Lost　his　focus。　Can’t　say　that　I　blame　him　—　the　big　bloodsucker　was　right　on　top　of　him。　He　sprang　—　
hey；　don’t　give　me　that　look。　The　vampire　was　on　our　land。”　

I　tried　to　pose　my　face　so　that　he　would　go　on。　My　nails　were　digging　into　my　palms　with　the　stress　of　
the　story；　even　though　I　knew　it　had　turned　out　fine。　
“Anyway；　Paul　missed；　and　the　big　one　got　back　on　his　side。　But　by　then　the；　er；　well　the；　uh；　blonde　。　。　。”　
Jacob’s　expression　was　a　ical　mix　of　disgust　and　unwilling　admiration　as　he　tried　to　e　up　with　a　word　
to　describe　Edward’s　sister。　
“Rosalie。”　
“Whatever。　She　got　real　territorial；　so　Sam　and　I　fell　back　to　get　Paul’s　flanks。　Then　their　leader　and　the　
other　blond　male　—”　
“Carlisle　and　Jasper。”　
He　gave　me　an　exasperated　look。　“You　know　I　don’t　really　care。　Anyway；　so　Carlisle　spoke　to　Sam；　
trying　to　calm　things　down。　Then　it　was　weird；　because　everyone　got　really　calm　really　fast。　It　was　that　other　
one　you　told　me　about；　messing　with　our　heads。　But　even　though　we　knew　what　he　was　doing；　we　couldn’t　
not　be　calm。”　
“Yeah；　I　know　how　it　feels。”　
“Really　annoying；　that’s　how　it　feels。　Only　you　can’t　be　annoyed　until　afterwards。”　He　shook　his　head　
angrily。　“So　Sam　and　the　head　vamp　agreed　that　Victoria　was　the　priority；　and　we　started　after　her　again。　
Carlisle　gave　us　the　line；　so　that　we　could　follow　the　scent　properly；　but　then　she　hit　the　cliffs　just　north　of　
Makah　country；　right　where　the　line　hugs　the　coast　for　a　few　miles。　She　took　off　into　the　water　again。　The　big　
one　and　the　calm　one　wanted　permission　to　cross　the　line　to　go　after　her；　but　of　course　we　said　no。”　
“Good。　I　mean；　you　were　being　stupid；　but　I’m　glad。　Emmett’s　never　cautious　enough。　He　could　have　
gotten　hurt。”　
Jacob　snorted。　“So　did　your　vampire　tell　you　we　attacked　for　no　reason　and　his　totally　innocent　coven　—”　
“No；”　I　interrupted。　“Edward　told　me　the　same　story；　just　without　quite　as　many　details。”　
“Huh；”　Jacob　said　under　his　breath；　and　he　bent　over　to　pick　up　a　rock　from　among　the　millions　of　
pebbles　at　our　feet。　With　a　casual　flick；　he　sent　it　flying　a　good　hundred　meters　out　into　the　bay。　“Well；　she’ll　
be　back；　I　guess。　We’ll　get　another　shot　at　her。”　
I　shuddered；　of　course　she　would　be　back。　Would　Edward　really　tell　me　next　time？　I　wasn’t　sure。　I’d　
have　to　keep　an　eye　on　Alice；　to　look　for　the　signs　that　the　pattern　was　about　to　repeat。　。　。　。　
Jacob　didn’t　seem　to　notice　my　reaction。　He　was　staring　across　the　waves　with　a　thoughtful　expression　on　
his　face；　his　broad　lips　pursed。　
“What　are　you　thinking　about？”　I　asked　after　a　long；　quiet　time。　
“I’m　thinking　about　what　you　told　me。　About　when　the　fortueller　saw　you　cliff　jumping　and　thought　
you’d　mitted　suicide；　and　how　it　all　got　out　of　control。　。　。　。　Do　you　realize　that　if　you　had　just　waited　for　
me　like　you　were　supposed　to；　then　the　bl　—　Alice　wouldn’t　have　been　able　to　see　you　jump？　Nothing　would　
have　changed。　We’d　probably　be　in　my　garage　right　now；　like　any　other　Saturday。　There　wouldn’t　be　any　
vampires　in　Forks；　and　you　and　me　。　。　。”　He　trailed　off；　deep　in　thought。　
It　was　disconcerting　the　way　he　said　this；　like　it　would　be　a　good　thing　to　have　no　vampires　in　Forks。　My　
heart　thumped　unevenly　at　the　emptiness　of　the　picture　he　painted。　
“Edward　would　have　e　back　anyway。”　
“Are　you　sure　about　that？”　he　asked；　belligerent　again　as　soon　as　I　spoke　Edward’s　name。　
“Being　apart　。　。　。　It　didn’t　work　out　so　well　for　either　of　us。”　
He　started　to　say　something；　something　angry　from　his　expression；　but　he　stopped　himself；　took　a　breath；　
and　began　again。　
“Did　you　know　Sam　is　mad　at　you？”　
“Me？”　It　took　me　a　second。　“Oh。　I　see。　He　thinks　they　would　have　stayed　away　if　I　wasn’t　here。”　
“No。　That’s　not　it。”　
“What’s　his　problem　then？”　
Jacob　leaned　down　to　scoop　up　another　rock。　He　turned　it　over　and　over　in　his　fingers；　his　eyes　were　
riveted　on　the　black　stone　while　he　spoke　in　a　low　voice。　
“When　Sam　saw　。　。　。　how　you　were　in　the　beginning；　when　Billy　told　them　how　Charlie　worried　when　you　
didn’t　get　better；　and　then　when　you　started　jumping　off　cliffs　。　。　。”　
I　made　a　face。　No　one　was　ever　going　to　let　me　forget　that。　

Jacob’s　eyes　flashed　up　to　mine。　“He　thought　you　were　the　one　person　in　the　world　with　as　much　reason　
to　hate　the　Cullens　as　he　does。　Sam　feels　sort　of　。　。　。　betrayed　that　you　would　just　let　them　back　into　your　life　
like　they　never　hurt　you。”　
I　didn’t　believe　for　a　second　that　Sam　was　the　only　one　who　felt　that　way。　And　the　acid　in　my　voice　now　
was　for　both　of　them。　
“You　can　tell　Sam　to　go　right　to　—”　
“Look　at　that；”　Jacob　interrupted　me；　pointing　to　an　eagle　in　the　act　of　plummeting　down　toward　the　ocean　
from　an　incredible　height。　It　checked　itself　at　the　last　minute；　only　its　talons　breaking　the　surface　of　the　waves；　
just　for　an　instant。　Then　it　flapped　away；　its　wings　straining　against　the　load　of　the　huge　fish　it　had　snagged。　
“You　see　it　everywhere；”　Jacob　said；　his　voice　suddenly　distant。　“Nature　taking　its　course　—　hunter　and　
prey；　the　endless　cycle　of　life　and　death。”　
I　didn’t　understand　the　point　of　the　nature　lecture；　I　guessed　that　he　was　just　trying　to　change　the　subject。　
But　then　he　looked　down　at　me　with　dark　humor　in　his　eyes。　
“And　yet；　you　don’t　see　the　fish　trying　to　plant　a　kiss　on　the　eagle。　You　never　see　that。”　He　grinned　a　
mocking　grin。　
I　grinned　back　tightly；　though　the　acid　taste　was　still　in　my　mouth。　“Maybe　the　fish　was　trying；”　I　
suggested。　“It’s　hard　to　tell　what　a　fish　is　thinking。　Eagles　are　goodlooking　birds；　you　know。”　
“Is　that　what　it　es　down　to？”　His　voice　was　abruptly　sharper。　“Good　looks？”　
“Don’t　be　stupid；　Jacob。”　
“Is　it　the　money；　then？”　he　persisted。　
“That’s　nice；”　I　muttered；　getting　up　from　the　tree。　“I’m　flattered　that　you　think　so　much　of　me。”　I　turned　
my　back　on　him　and　paced　away。　
“Aw；　don’t　get　mad。”　He　was　right　behind　me；　he　caught　my　wrist　and　spun　me　around。　“I’m　serious！　I’m　
trying　to　understand　here；　and　I’m　ing　up　blank。”　
His　eyebrows　pushed　together　angrily；　and　his　eyes　were　black　in　their　deep　shadow。　
“I　love　him。　Not　because　he’s　beautiful　or　because　he’s　rich！”　I　spat　the　word　at　Jacob。　“I’d　much　rather　
he　weren’t　either　one。　It　would　even　out　the　gap　between　us　just　a　little　bit　—　because　he’d　still　be　the　most　
loving　and　unselfish　and　brilliant　and　decent　person　I’ve　ever　met。　Of　course　I　love　him。　How　hard　is　that　to　
understand？”　
“It’s　impossible　to　understand。”　
“Please　enlighten　me；　then；　Jacob。”　I　let　the　sarcasm　flow　thick。　“What　is　a　valid　reason　for　someone　to　
love　someone　else？　Since　apparently　I’m　doing　it　wrong。”　
“I　think　the　best　place　to　start　would　be　to　look　within　your　own　species。　That　usually　works。”　
“Well；　that　just　sucks！”　I　snapped。　“I　guess　I’m　stuck　with　Mike　Newton　after　all。”　
Jacob　flinched　back　and　bit　his　lip。　I　could　see　that　my　words　had　hurt　him；　but　I　was　too　mad　to　feel　bad　
about　that　yet。　He　dropped　my　wrist　and　folded　his　arms　across　his　chest；　turning　from　me　to　glare　toward　the　
ocean。　
“I’m　human；”　he　muttered；　his　voice　almost　inaudible。　
“You’re　not　as　human　as　Mike；”　I　continued　ruthlessly。　“Do　you　still　think　that’s　the　most　important　
consideration？”　
“It’s　not　the　same　thing。”　Jacob　didn’t　look　away　from　the　gray　waves。　“I　didn’t　choose　this。”　
I　laughed　once　in　disbelief。　“Do　you　think　Edward　did？　He　didn’t　know　what　was　happening　to　him　any　
more　than　you　did。　He　didn’t　exactly　sign　up　for　this。”　
Jacob　was　shaking　his　head　back　and　forth　with　a　small；　quick　movement。　
“You　know；　Jacob；　you’re　awfully　selfrighteous　—　considering　that　you’re　a　werewolf　and　all。”　
“It’s　not　the　same；”　Jacob　repeated；　glowering　at　me。　
“I　don’t　see　why　not。　You　could　be　a　bit　more　understanding　about　the　Cullens。　You　have　no　idea　how　
truly　good　they　are　—　to　the　core；　Jacob。”　
He　frowned　more　deeply。　“They　shouldn’t　exist。　Their　existence　goes　against　nature。”　
I　stared　at　him　for　a　long　moment　with　one　eyebrow　raised　incredulously。　It　was　a　while　before　he　noticed。　
“What？”　
“Speaking　of　unnatural　。　。　。　；”　I　hinted。　

“Bella；”　he　said；　his　voice　slow　and　different。　Aged。　I　realized　that　he　sounded　suddenly　older　than　me　—　
like　a　parent　or　a　teacher。　“What　I　am　was　born　in　me。　It’s　a　part　of　who　I　am；　who　my　family　is；　who　we　all　
are　as　a　tribe　—　it’s　the　reason　why　we’re　still　here。　
“Besides　that”　—　he　looked　down　at　me；　his　black　eyes　unreadable　—　“I　am　stillhuman。”　
He　picked　up　my　hand　and　pressed　it　to　his　feverwarm　chest。　Through　his　tshirt；　I　could　feel　the　steady　
beating　of　his　heart　under　my　palm。　
“Normal　humans　can’t　throw　motorcycles　around　the　way　you　can。”　
He　smiled　a　faint；　halfsmile。　“Normal　humans　run　away　from　monsters；　Bella。　And　I　never　claimed　to　be　
normal。　Just　human。”　
Staying　angry　with　Jacob　was　too　much　work。　I　started　to　smile　as　I　pulled　my　hand　away　from　his　chest。　
“You　look　plenty　human　to　me；”　I　allowed。　“At　the　moment。”　
“I　feel　human。”　He　stared　past　me；