new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)-第50部分

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much　for　me？　I　thought　he　
would。　He　wouldn't　begrudge　me　this：　giving　just　a　small　bit　of　love　he　didn't　
want　to　my　friend　Jacob。　
After　all；　it　wasn't　the　same　love　at　all。　
Jake　pressed　his　warm　cheek　against　the　top　of　my　hair。　
If　I　turned　my　face　to　the　side—if　I　pressed　my　lips　against　his　bare　
shoulder。。。　I　knew　without　any　doubt　
what　would　follow。　It　would　be　very　easy。　There　would　be　no　need　for　
explanations　tonight。　
But　could　I　do　it？　Could　I　betray　my　absent　heart　to　save　my　pathetic　life？　
Butterflies　assaulted　my　stomach　as　I　thought　of　turning　my　head。　
And　then；　as　clearly　as　if　I　were　in　immediate　danger；　Edward's　velvet　voice　
whispered　in　my　ear。　
〃Be　happy；〃　he　told　me。　
I　froze。　
Jacob　felt　me　stiffen　and　released　me　automatically；　reaching　for　the　door。　
Wait；　I　wanted　to　say。　Just　a　minute。　But　I　was　still　locked　in　place；　
listening　to　the　echo　of　Edward's　
voice　in　my　head。　
Storm…cooled　air　blew　through　the　cab　of　the　truck。　
〃OH！〃　The　breath　whooshed　out　of　Jacob　like　someone　had　punched　him　in　the　
gut。　〃Holy　crap！〃　
He　slammed　the　door　and　twisted　the　keys　in　the　ignition　at　the　same　moment。　
His　hands　were　shaking　
so　hard　I　didn't　know　how　he　managed　it。　
〃What's　wrong？〃　
He　revved　the　engine　too　fast；　it　sputtered　and　faltered。　
〃Vampire；〃　he　spit　out。　
The　blood　rushed　from　my　head　and　left　me　dizzy。　〃How　do　you　know？〃　
〃Because　I　can　smell　it。　Dammit！〃　
Jacob's　eyes　were　wild；　raking　the　dark　street。　He　barely　seemed　aware　of　the　
tremors　that　were　rolling　
through　his　body。　〃Phase　or　get　her　out　of　here？〃　he　hissed　at　himself。　
He　looked　down　at　me　for　a　split　second；　taking　in　my　horror…struck　eyes　and　
white　face；　and　then　he　
was　scanning　the　street　again。　〃Right。　Get　you　out。〃　
The　engine　caught　with　a　roar。　The　tires　squealed　as　he　spun　the　truck　around；　
turning　toward　our　only　
escape。　The　headlights　washed　across　the　pavement；　lit　the　front　line　of　the　
black　forest；　and　finally　
glinted　off　a　car　parked　across　the　street　from　my　house。　
〃Stop！〃　I　gasped。　
It　was　a　black　car—a　car　I　knew。　I　might　be　the　furthest　thing　from　an　
autophile；　but　I　could　tell　you　
everything　about　that　particular　car。　It　was　a　Mercedes　S55　AMG。　I　knew　the　
horsepower　and　the　color　
of　the　interior。　I　knew　the　feel　of　the　powerful　engine　purring　through　the　
frame。　I　knew　the　rich　smell　of　
the　leather　seats　and　the　way　the　extra…dark　tint　made　noon　look　like　dusk　
through　those　windows。　
It　was　Carlisle's　car。　
〃Stop！〃　I　cried　again；　louder　this　time；　because　Jacob　was　gunning　the　truck　
down　the　street。　
〃What？！〃　
〃It's　not　Victoria。　Stop；　stop！　I　want　to　go　back。〃　
He　stomped　on　the　brake　so　hard　I　had　to　catch　myself　against　the　dashboard。　
〃What？〃　he　asked　again；　aghast。　He　stared　at　me　with　horror　in　his　eyes。　
〃It's　Carlisle's　car！　It's　the　Cullens。　I　know　it。〃　
He　watched　dawn　break　across　my　face；　and　a　violent　tremor　rocked　his　frame。　
〃Hey；　calm　down；　Jake。　It's　okay。　No　danger；　see？　Relax。〃　
〃Yeah；　calm；〃　he　panted；　putting　his　head　down　and　closing　his　eyes。　While　he　
concentrated　on　not　
exploding　into　a　wolf；　I　stared　out　the　back　window　at　the　black　car。　
It　was　just　Carlisle；　I　told　myself。　Don't　expect　anything　more。　Maybe　Esme　
Stop　right　there；　I　told　
myself。　Just　Carlisle。　That　was　plenty。　More　than　I'd　ever　hoped　to　have　
again。　
〃There's　a　vampire　in　your　house；〃　Jacob　hissed。　〃And　you　want　to　go　back？〃　
I　glanced　at　him；　ripping　my　unwilling　eyes　off　the　Mercedes—terrified　that　
it　would　disappear　the　second　
I　looked　away。　
〃Of　course；〃　I　said；　my　voice　blank　with　surprise　at　his　question。　Of　course　I　
wanted　to　go　back。　
Jacob's　face　hardened　while　I　stared　at　him；　congealing　into　the　bitter　mask　
that　I'd　thought　was　gone　for　
good。　Just　before　he　had　the　mask　in　place；　I　caught　the　spasm　of　betrayal　
that　flashed　in　his　eyes。　His　
hands　were　still　shaking。　He　looked　ten　years　older　than　me。　
He　took　a　deep　breath。　〃You're　sure　it's　not　a　trick？〃　he　asked　in　a　slow；　
heavy　voice。　
〃It's　not　a　trick。　It's　Carlisle。　Take　me　back！〃　
A　shudder　rippled　through　his　wide　shoulders；　but　his　eyes　were　flat　and　
emotionless。　〃No。〃　
〃Jake；　it's　okay—〃　
〃No。　Take　yourself　back；　Bella。〃　His　voice　was　a　slap—I　flinched　as　the　sound　
of　it　struck　me。　His　jaw　
clenched　and　unclenched。　
〃Look；　Bella；〃　he　said　in　the　same　hard　voice。　〃I　can't　go　back。　Treaty　or　no　
treaty；　that's　my　enemy　in　
there。〃　
〃It's　not　like　that—〃　
〃I　have　to　tell　Sam　right　away。　This　changes　things。　We　can't　be　caught　on　
their　territory。〃　
〃Jake；　it's　not　a　war！〃　
He　didn't　listen。　He　put　the　truck　in　neutral　and　jumped　out　the　door；　leaving　
it　running。　
〃Bye；　Bella；〃　he　called　back　over　his　shoulder。　〃I　really　hope　you　don't　die。〃　
He　sprinted　into　the　
darkness；　shaking　so　hard　that　his　shape　seemed　blurred；　he　disappeared　before　
I　could　open　my　mouth　
to　call　him　back。　
Remorse　pinned　me　against　the　seat　for　one　long　second。　What　had　I　just　done　
to　Jacob'？　
But　remorse　couldn't　hold　me　very　long。　
I　slid　across　the　seat　and　put　the　truck　back　in　drive。　My　hands　were　shaking　
almost　as　hard　as　Jake's　
had　been；　and　this　took　a　minute　of　concentration。　Then　I　carefully　turned　the　
truck　around　and　drove　it　
back　to　my　house。　
It　was　very　dark　when　I　turned　off　the　headlights。　Charlie　had　left　in　such　a　
hurry　that　he'd　forgotten　to　
leave　the　porch　lamp　on。　I　felt　a　pang　of　doubt；　staring　at　the　house；　deep　in　
shadow。　What　if　it　was　a　
trick？　
I　looked　back　at　the　black　car；　almost　invisible　in　the　night。　No。　I　knew　that　
car。　
Still；　my　hands　were　shaking　even　worse　than　before　as　I　reached　for　the　key　
above　the　door。　When　I　
grabbed　the　doorknob　to　unlock　it；　it　twisted　easily　under　my　hand。　I　let　the　
door　fall　open。　The　hallway　
was　black。　
I　wanted　to　call　out　a　greeting；　but　my　throat　was　too　dry。　I　couldn't　quite　
seem　to　catch　my　breath。　
I　took　a　step　inside　and　fumbled　for　the　light　switch。　It　was　so　black—like　
the　black　water　Where　was　
that　switch？　
Just　like　the　black　water；　with　the　orange　flame　flickering　impossibly　on　top　
of　it。　Flame　that　couldn't　be　a　
fire；　but　what　then　？　My　fingers　traced　the　wall；　still　searching；　still　
shaking—　
Suddenly；　something　Jacob　had　told　me　this　afternoon　echoed　in　my　head；　
finally　sinking　in　She　took　
off　into　the　water；　he'd　said。　The　bloodsuckers　have　the　advantage　there。　
That's　why　I　raced　home　
—I　was　afraid　she　was　going　to　double　back　swimming。　
My　hand　froze　in　its　searching；　my　whole　body　froze　into　place；　as　I　realized　
why　I　recognized　the　
strange　orange　color　on　the　water。　
Victoria's　hair；　blowing　wild　in　the　wind；　the　color　of　fire　
She'd　been　right　there。　Right　there　in　the　harbor　with　me　and　Jacob。　If　Sam　
hadn't　been　there；　if　it　had　
been　just　the　two　of　us　？　I　couldn't　breathe　or　move。　
The　light　flicked　on；　though　my　frozen　hand　had　still　not　found　the　switch。　
I　blinked　into　the　sudden　light；　and　saw　that　someone　was　there；　waiting　for　
me。　
　17。　VISITOR
UNNATURALLY　STILL　AND　WHITE；　WITH　LARGE　BLACK　EYES　intent　on　my　face；　my　
visitor　
waited　perfectly　motionless　in　the　center　of　the　halt；　beautiful　beyond　
imagining。　
My　knees　trembled　for　a　second；　and　I　nearly　fell。　Then　I　hurled　myself　at　
her。　
〃Alice；　oh；　Alice！〃　I　cried；　as　I　slammed　into　her。　
I'd　forgotten　how　hard　she　was；　it　was　like　running　headlong　into　a　wall　of　
cement。　
〃Bella？〃　There　was　a　strange　mingling　of　relief　and　confusion　in　her　voice。　
I　locked　my　arms　around　her；　gasping　to　inhale　as　much　of　the　scent　of　her　
skin　as　possible。　It　wasn't　like　
anything　else—not　floral　or　spice；　citrus　or　musk。　No　perfume　in　the　world　
could　pare。　My　memory　
hadn't　done　it　justice。　
I　didn't　notice　when　the　gasping　turned　into　something　else—I　only　realized　I　
was　sobbing　when　Alice　
dragged　me　to　the　living　room　couch　and　pulled　me　into　her　lap。　It　was　like　
curling　up　into　a　cool　stone；　
but　a　stone　that　was　contoured　fortingly　to　the　shape　of　my　body。　She　
rubbed　my　back　in　a　gentle　
rhythm；　waiting　for　me　to　get　control　of　myself。　
〃I'm　sorry；〃　I　blubbered。　〃I'm　just　so　happy　to　see　you！〃　
〃It's　okay；　Bella。　Everything's　okay。〃　
〃Yes；〃　I　bawled。　And；　for　once；　it　seemed　that　way。　
Alice　sighed。　〃I'd　forgotten　how　exuberant　you　are；〃　she　said；　and　her　tone　
was　disapproving。　
I　looked　up　at　her　through　my　streaming　eyes。　Alice's　neck　was　tight；　
straining　away　from　me；　her　lips　
pressed　together　firmly。　Her　eyes　were　black　as　pitch。　
〃Oh；〃　I　puffed；　as　I　realized　the　problem。　She　was　thirsty。　And　I　smelled　
appetizing。　It　had　been　a　while　
since　I'd　had　to　think　about　that　kind　of　thing。　〃Sorry。〃　
〃It's　my　own　fault。　It's　been　too　long　since　I　hunted。　I　shouldn't　let　myself　
get　so　thirsty。　But　I　was　in　a　
hurry　today。〃　The　look　she　directed　at　me　then　was　a　glare。　〃Speaking　of　
which；　would　you　like　to　
explain　to　me　how　you're　alive？〃　
That　brought　me　up　short　and　stopped　the　sobs。　I　realized　what　must　have　
happened　immediately；　and　
why　Alice　was　here。　
I　swallowed　loudly。　〃You　saw　me　fall。〃　
〃No；〃　she　disagreed；　her　eyes　narrowing。　〃I　saw　you　jump。〃　
I　pursed　my　lips　as　I　tried　to　think　of　an　explanation　that　wouldn't　sound　
nuts。　
Alice　shook　her　head。　〃I　told　him　this　would　happen；　but　he　didn't　believe　me。　
'Bella　promised；'〃　her　
voice　imitated　his　so　perfectly　that　I　iroze　in　shock　while　the　pain　ripped　
through　my　torso。　〃'Don't　be　
looking　for　her　future；　either；'〃　she　continued　to　quote　him。　'〃We've　done　
enough　damage。〃　
〃But　just　because　I'm　not　looking；　doesn't　mean　I　don't　see〃　she　went　on。　〃I　
wasn't　keeping　tabs　on　you；　
I　swear；　Bella。　It's　just　that　I'm　alreacy　attuned　to　you　when　I　saw　you　
jumping；　I　didn't　think；　I　just　got　
on　a　plane。　I　knew　I　would　be　too　late；　but　I　couldn't　do　nothing。　And　then　I　
get　here；　thinking　maybe　I　
could　help　Charlie　somehow；　and　you　drive　up。〃　She　shook　her　head；　this　time　
in　confusion。　Her　voice　
was　strained。　〃I　saw　you　go　into　the　water　and　I　waited　and　waited　for　you　to　
e　up；　but　you　didn't。　
What　happened？　And　how　could　you　do　that　to　Charlie？　Did　you　stop　to　think　
what　this　would　do　to　
him？　And　my　brother？　D