new moon(暮光之城-新月英文版)-第48部分
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so much luckier。 Who wanted to see a rerun; anyway?
I saw him; and I had no will to fight。 It was so clear; so much more defined
than any memory。 My
subconscious had stored Edward away in flawless detail; saving him for this
final moment。 I could see his
perfect face as if he were really there; the exact shade of his icy skin; the
shape of his lips; the line of his
jaw; the gold glinting in his furious eyes。 He was angry; naturally; that I
was giving up。 His teeth were
clenched and his nostrils flared with rage。
〃No! Bella; no!〃
My ears were flooded with the freezing water; but his voice was clearer than
ever。 I ignored his words
and concentrated on the sound of his voice。 Why would I fight when I was so
happy where I was? Even
as my lungs burned for more air and my legs cramped in the icy cold; I was
content。 I'd forgotten what
real happiness felt like。
Happiness。 It made the whole dying thing pretty bearable。
The current won at that moment; shoving me abruptly against something hard; a
rock invisible in the
gloom。 It hit me solidly across the chest; slamming into me like an iron bar;
and the breath whooshed out
of my lungs; escaping in a thick cloud of silver bubbles。 Water flooded down
my throat; choking and
burning。 The iron bar seemed to be dragging me; pulling me away from Edward;
deeper into the dark; to
the ocean floor。
Goodbye; I love you; was my last thought。
16。 PARIS
AT THAT MOMENT; MY HEAD BROKE THE SURFACE。
How disorienting。 I'd been sure I was sinking。
The current wouldn't let up。 It was slamming me against more rocks; they beat
against the center of my
back sharply; rhythmically; pushing the water from my lungs。 It gushed out in
amazing volume; absolute
torrents pouring from my mouth and nose。 The salt burned and my lungs burned
and my throat was too
full of water to catch a breath and the rocks were hurting my back。 Somehow I
stayed in one place;
though the waves still heaved around me。 I couldn't see anything but water
everywhere; reaching for my
face。
〃Breathe!〃 a voice; wild with anxiety; ordered; and I felt a cruel stab of
pain wher I recognized the
voice—because it wasn't Edward's。
I could not obey。 The waterfall pouring from my mouth didn't stop long enough
for me to catch a breath。
The black; icy water filled my chest; burning。
The rock smacked into my back again; right between my shoulder blades; and
another volley of water
choked its way out of my lungs。
〃Breathe; Bella! C'mon!〃 Jacob begged。
Black spots bloomed across my vision; getting wider and wider; blocking out
the light。
The rock struck me again。
The rock wasn't cold like the water; it was hot on my skin。 I realized it was
Jacob's hand; trying to beat
the water from my lungs。 The iron bar that had dragged me from the sea was
also warm My head
whirled; the black spots covered everything
Was I dying again; then? I didn't like it—this wasn't as good as the last
time。 It was only dark now;
nothing worth looking at here。 The sound of the crashing waves faded into the
black and became a quiet;
even whoosh that sounded like it was ing from the inside of my ears
〃Bella?〃 Jacob asked; his voice still tense; but not as wild as before。
〃Bells; honey; can you hear me?〃
The contents of my head swished and rolled sickeningly; like they'd joined the
rough water
〃How long has she been unconscious?〃 someone else asked。
The voice that was not Jacob's shocked me; jarred me into a more focused
awareness。
I realized that I was still。 There was no tug of the current on me—the
heaving was inside my head。 The
surface under me was flat and motionless。 It felt grainy against my bare arms。
〃I don't know;〃 Jacob reported; still frantic。 His voice was very close。 Hands
—so warm they had to be
his—brushed wet hair from my cheeks。 〃A few minutes? It didn't take long to
tow her to the beach。〃
The quiet whooshing inside my ears was not the waves—it was the air moving in
and out of my lungs
again。 Each breath burned—the passageways were as raw as if I'd scrubbed them
out with steel wool。
But I was breathing。
And I was freezing。 A thousand sharp; icy beads were striking my face and
arms; making the cold worse。
〃She's breathing。 She'll e around。 We should get her out of the cold;
though。 I don't like the color
she's turning〃 I recognized Sam's voice this time。
〃You think it's okay to move her?〃
〃She didn't hurt her back or anything when she fell?〃
〃I don't know。〃
They hesitated。
I tried to open my eyes。 It took me a minute; but then I could see the dark;
purple clouds; flinging the
freezing rain down at me。 〃Jake?〃 I croaked。
Jacob's face blocked out the sky。 〃Oh!〃 he gasped; relief washing over his
features。 His eyes were wet
from the rain。 〃Oh; Bella! Are you okay? Can you hear me? Do you hurt
anywhere?〃
〃J…Just m…my throat;〃 I stuttered; my lips quivering from the cold。
〃Let's get you out of here; then;〃 Jacob said。 He slid his arms under me and
lifted me without effort—like
picking up an empty box。 His chest was bare and warm; he hunched his shoulders
to keep the rain off of
me。 My head lolled over his arm。 I stared vacantly back toward the furious
water; beating the sand
behindhim。
〃You got her?〃 I heard Sam ask。
〃Yeah; I'll take it from here。 Get back to the hospital。 I'll join you later。
Thanks; Sam。〃
My head was still rolling。 None of his words sunk in at first。 Sam didn't
answer。 There was no sound; and
I wondered if he were already gone。
The water licked and writhed up the sand after us as Jacob carried me away;
like it was angry that I'd
escaped。 As I stared wearily; a spark of color caught my unfocused eyes—a
small flash of fire was
dancing on the black water; far out in the bay。 The image made no sense; and I
wondered how conscious
I really was。 My head swirled with the memory of the black; churning water—of
being so lost that I
couldn't find up or down。 So lost but somehow Jacob
〃How did you find me?〃 I rasped。
〃I was searching for you;〃 he told me。 He was half…jogging through the rain;
up the beach toward the
road。 〃I followed the tire tracks to your truck; and then I heard you scream
〃 He shuddered。 〃Why
would you jump; Bella? Didn't you notice that it's turning into a hurricane
out here? Couldn't you have
waited for me?〃 Anger filled his tone as the relief faded。
〃Sorry;〃 I muttered。 〃It was stupid。〃
〃Yeah; it was really stupid;〃 he agreed; drops of rain shaking free of his
hair as he nodded。 〃Look; do
you mind saving the stupid stuff for when I'm around? I won't be able to
concentrate if I think you're
jumping off cliffs behind my back。〃
〃Sure;〃 I agreed。 〃No problem。〃 I sounded like a chain…smoker。 I tried to
clear my throat—and then
winced; the throat…clearing felt like stabbing a knife down there。 〃What
happened today? Did you find
her?〃 It was my turn to shudder; though I wasn't so cold here; right next to
his ridiculous body heat。
Jacob shook his head。 He was still more running than walking as he headed up
the road to his house。
〃No。 She took off into the water—the bloodsuckers have the advantage there。
That's why I raced
home—I was afraid she was going to double back swimming。 You spend so much
time on the beach〃
He trailed off; a catch in his throat。
〃Sam came back with you is everyone else home; too?〃 I hoped they weren't
still out searching for her。
〃Yeah。 Sort of。〃
I tried to read his expression; squinting into the hammering rain。 His eyes
were tight with worry or pain。
The words that hadn't made sense before suddenly did。 〃You said hospital。
Before; to Sam。 Is
someone hurt? Did she fight you?〃 My voice jumped up an octave; sounding
strange with the hoarseness。
〃No; no。 When we got back; Em was waiting with the news。 It's Harry
Clearwater。 Harry had a heart
attack this morning。〃
〃Harry?〃 I shook my head; trying to absorb what he was staying。 〃Oh; no! Does
Charlie know?〃
〃Yeah。 He's over there; too; with my dad。〃
〃Is Harry going to be okay?〃
Jacob's eyes tightened again。 〃It doesn't look so great right now。〃
Abruptly; I felt really sick with guilt—felt truly horrible about the
brainless cliff dive。 Nobody needed to
be worrying about me right now。 What a stupid time to be reckless。
〃What can I do?〃 I asked。
At that moment the rain stopped。 I hadn't realized we were already back to
Jacob's house until he
walked through the door。 The storm pounded against the roof。
〃You can stay here;〃 Jacob said as he dumped me on the short couch。 〃I mean it
—right here I'll get you
some dry clothes。〃
I let my eyes adjust to the dark room while Jacob banged around in his
bedroom。 The cramped front
room seemed so empty without Billy; almost desolate。 It was strangely ominous
—probably just because
I knew where he was。
Jacob was back in seconds。 He threw a pile of gray cotton at me。 〃These will
be huge on you; but it's the
best I've got。 I'll; er; step outside so you can change。〃
〃Don't go anywhere。 I'm too tired to move yet。 Just stay with me。〃
Jacob sat on the floor next to me; his back against the couch。 I wondered when
he'd slept last。 He
looked as exhausted as I felt。
He leaned his head on the cushion next to mine and yawned。 〃Guess I could rest
for a minute〃
His eyes closed。 I let mine slide shut; too。
Poor Harry。 Poor Sue。 I knew Charlie was going to be beside himself。 Harry was
one of his best friends。
Despite Jake's negative take on things; I hoped fervently that Harry would
pull through。 For Charlie's
sake。 For Sue's and Leah's and Seth's
Billy's sofa was right next to the radiator; and I was warm now; despite my
soaked clothes。 My lungs
ached in a way that pushed me toward unconsciousness rather than keeping me
awake。 I wondered
vaguely if it was wrong to sleep or was I getting drowning mixed up with
concussions ? Jacob
began softly snoring; and the sound of it soothed like a lullaby。 I fell
asleep quickly。
For the first time in a very long time; my dream was just a normal dream。 Just
a blurred wandering
through old memories—blinding bright visions of the Ph